Warning: This blog is about my tummy. If you're not interested in reading my reaction to my tummy, please skip this entry and move straight to my question of the day. Thanks!
Yes, I should be sleeping and I am not. Partly it's that silly low blood sugar thing again (you should see how good my blood glucose levels have been since the surgery! They are great, but going too low has been happening a bit, too) but that's not the only problem. I haven't managed to fall asleep yet tonight but I'm not sure why. I know it's not the pain. That is getting better each day. Maybe I am still just freaked out by myself.
(For those who are just getting to know me and need a quick background, here it is in 50 words or so: On 10/16/03 I had a gastric bypass. From then until 7/29/05, I lost 111 pounds. Two weeks ago, I had my third incisional hernia repair but I also had a panniculectomy, which is a tummy tuck to remove all the leftover fat and skin hanging from my abdomen after the weight loss.)
See, here's the deal: My general surgeon removed the last Jackson-Prewitt drain from my abdomen today ( yeah!). I am so glad he removed it. That last one was really hurting me and I'm so relieved to have it gone; the pain issue has improved a lot just due to that. Now, although I still have two bandages where the drains were removed and I still have steri-strips over all the stitches (there are many more than a hundred, according to my plastic surgeon), I can finally see the shape of my "new" tummy. Add to that the fact that I've lost all the water weight from the hospital (having an IV really packs on the pounds!). Also, since my tummy is back in a little space where it belongs, I haven't been eating much and I've started losing weight again. Woo Hoo! The upshot is that I am now 10 pounds lighter than I was before the surgery and I have this wonderfully, amazingly flat tummy that I have never had in my life! OK, it's a little rounded, but it's this gentle rounding that is actually quite feminine and it won't bother me a bit. Let's just say that for the first time since, oh say, seventh grade, I can look all the way down my body from sternum to toes in one unbroken line! I see no alien children and no icky flabby hangy-downy-tummy-thing!
So, bottom line, I keep looking in mirrors, windows, anything with an even slightly reflective surface and staring at my body. Tonight, Champs took me out on date night to see Sky High (it's a pretty cute movie, by the way) and I wore this pair of pink sweats that I bought for my recovery period. They were an exact fit and just ever-so-slightly snug before the surgery. Tonight they looked amazing; they didn't even hug my thighs, much less my tummy! I also wore a white long-sleeved tee-shirt (yes, cotton tees - the nice ones, not the printed ones, are my personal "uniform") that I've always loved but not worn very often because it didn't cover my tummy. Tonight it looked perfect.
I'm sorry; this isn't meant to brag. This is pure rejoicing! Thank you, Thank you, Thank you Jesus! (And, thank you Dr. R, my surgeon and Dr. R, my plastic surgeon and even thank you, silly insurance company that took six months to approve this!) I've never had a body like this. I felt cute. I felt healthy. Truth to tell, I felt sexy - even with bandages and a binder on. I've never felt this way before. I'm not sure how long I will be on this high, but I know that for a while yet I will be looking in mirrors and saying "OHMIGOSH, is that ME?!?!?!"